Wednesday, July 12, 2006

"I'm Still Dubious About This Buzzer"

"I'm Still Dubious About This Buzzer"

"What came after the Tudors but before -"

That's it, my hand's hit the buzzer; I'm not missing out on this question. All that time of being surgically attached to a large red hardback book about the Kings and Queens of England won't let me miss out on this one. Given my preferred reading material as a child (kings and queens, Enid Blyton, The Chronicles of Narnia) I'm always vaguely surprised that I turned out the way I did. Maybe all children are innately conservative (with a small 'c').

"The Stuarts"

"I'll finish the question: what came after the Tudors but before the Reformation?"

Val and I exchange looks. Surely he meant the 'Restoration' considering that the Reformation took place during the reign of Henry VIII who was, last time I checked, a flag waving, badge carrying, paid up member of the Tudor dynasty.

"If you agree with 'The Stuarts' press your buzzers now"

We get the ten seconds while people press their buzzers. And yes I know this is weird, I'm doing a pub quiz that has a buzzer, but in the quest of finding the Perfect Pub Quiz (translating as one which we can win) no stone is being left unturned. Even stones where there is a buzzer playing Queen.

"Right, everyone agrees with you which means we might have a little problem. I might be wrong"

I think we can agree here that our host being wrong is a much better solution for all concerned than me being wrong.

"What answer have you got?" And please note, despite the fact I have alcohol in my veins, I manage to say this without sounding like I'm accusing him of war crimes.

"The Renaissance".

I'm a little aghast at this stage because it's pointing to a bundle of things. One, our host doesn't know what the Renaissance was. Two, he doesn't know who either the Tudors or the Stuarts were. Three, he doesn't know the difference between the Reformation and the Restoration. Four, he's got no concept of a historical period spanning two hundred years. And five - he's saying that I'm wrong.

"I got it out of a book"

Books - the greatest weapons in the world providing you know how to use them.

The guy on the next table, a member of The Ducks of Hazzard, tries to explain what the Renaissance was to our host. It's not working.

Val takes a different tack and tries to explain why the question was wrong.

"Your mum thinks I'm right"

There's that kind of earth shattering silence that I've heard before. I feel a glimmer of pity for him. Only a glimmer though because he's just said I'm wrong.

"I'm not her mum"

The reaction is immediate. Lightning flashes through the air, the host is burnt to cinders, the room full of pub quizzers laugh.

"You should give us the points now".

And if the moral and intellectual highground hadn't sealed it I know I've got it covered now. Ten points in the bag.


Val said...

I actually felt a bit sorry for him afterwards, as I think he got a bit scared in the face of the combined wrath, though its a good job he apologised again as we left.

Still looking for the one that plays to our strengths :-)

cat said...

did you have a team name? and where did you place? these are the questions we need answered!

Corinne said...

How rude of me not to answer -

Like our Race Horse we were Northern Glory and, erm, we weren't last. But then we weren't first either. ;-)