This morning my scout returned my lamp that had been missing. She also informed me that the house had been burgled during the vacation.
Let's just rewind that sentence for a moment.
We got burgled during the vac.
Now this fact does raise a few questions. Namely why anyone would go to the trouble of burgling an empty college house during a time when there is only beds and empty wardrobes in the rooms the students live in and white boards and marker pens in the seminar rooms. So I'm thinking that these people aren't necessarily conversant with how the system at Oxford works.
On discovering that there wasn't anything that they could steal it seems they settled for the next best thing - causing complete chaos. This consisted of them emptying all the food that we'd left all over the kitchen - and since this was stuff like coffee and sugar in my case and tomato ketchup in the case of another housemate this didn't sound pretty - and throwing our plates and cutlery around.
We now have to write lists of anything that is missing so that it can be replaced. Of the things that I'd left in the kitchen there were a number that, in the face of nothing electrical and expensive to take, might have disappeared. My boxed kettle, new toaster or new iron or, if they were desperate, a sandwich toaster. But no, they all remain. Instead it seems that I have lost:
1. A plastic jug.
2. A wooden spoon.
3. A pair of scissors.
4. Two tea-towels.
5. A cloth.
6. Sugar, Tea, Coffee and a box of cuppa-soup.
Most painfully, however, stands the next one:
7. A Bailey's Latte Glass.
And as I was composing the list it hit me that the buggers had probably broken my glass. Given that they broke New Housemate's door I probably got off lightly, but of all my glasses it had to be that one. And I can't even claim for it. Bastards.
And just to cement the problems of 48 Woodstock, as well as having no internet we now have no hot water either. They are apparently sorting the issue today, but if not I will be getting very stroppy in the Bursar's Office tomorrow morning. You'll probably hear me.