Wednesday, January 05, 2005

About DA

About DA

"In just over a fortnight I have become a little bit rock and roll. And I like that because, c'mon, I stalk musicians. In my head I'm a bit rock and roll already".

Distant Aggravation was born on a computer named Ben (short for Benedick of Much Ado fame) in a blue-plaqued house at St Anne's College, Oxford at the end of January 2005. As it stands it is currently being written on a laptop named George (short for, erm, George, of Lord Byron fame) in a house in Leeds which - as yet - doesn't have a blue plaque.

The title of the blog comes from a line of a song entitled 'More Than Me': "a simple questioning goodbye means that no one hears your distant aggravation" and was chosen for no other reason than that I loved the phrase. And, anyway, it's really DA now given that I seem to have spawned Team DA. If you're reading this then consider yourself a fully paid up member. Wear the badge with pride, my friends.

"It's times like this that I suspect I was away reading Byron when common sense was being handed out".

Not long after I started writing DA I gained the picture of Marilyn Monroe that sits above you now. And you might be wondering why there's a picture of Marilyn up there when, even given my penchant for Icons, I'm more likely to blind you with a bit of Ginny Woolf or Byron. Well, firstly - and possibly most importantly - I chose Marilyn because I love the dress she's wearing in the picture. And I'm a girl who's swayed by a good dress. Secondly, I like her as a poster girl for the name 'distant aggravation'. Somehow it fits. And thirdly, somewhere in America there's a cardboard cutout with Marilyn's body and Ginny Woolf's head. Which is mindboggling. And not a little intriguing. Which is probably a long and twisted way of saying that Marilyn is one of those 20th century female icons who can be fashioned to say whatever you want. And who you all probably have opinions about. Which is something I like playing with. Regardless, I couldn't imagine DA without her.

"I end up with someone I don't know. And, holy crap, he kind of looks like Alan Rickman. Alan Rickman circa a few years ago but Alan Rickman nontheless. There is no hope for me as I have the palm of (almost) Alan Rickman in my face".

It should be noted here that as I am famously inept as a camera-woman I rarely include photos on DA that I have taken myself. So here's the roll call [and thank you] for those whose photos I have stolen with frightening regularity: Val [almost DA's official photographer], Nik, Gayle and Shona.

"Today I stood in the midst of a theatre, with my name on all the posters outside, with people saying my lines, and even our Production Manager breaking at one point to say to the actors "you're not putting your glasses on the mats. In Sophie's house you'd put the glasses on the mats". And he's right. Sophie would make you put your glass on a coaster".

So, with no further ado, here are the ten DA Commandments:

1. DA will blog as often as humanly possible.

2. DA does not worry about spelling mistakes, because perfect spelling is for people with tidy homes.

3. DA promises to be honest within the barriers of libel and decency, and the whims of a writer who likes an easy joke.

4. DA proclaims that Sienna Boho-Princess is a goddess.

5. DA believes that it is more important to be interesting than to be right.

6. Except when it comes to quizes, when it is clearly more important to be right.

7. DA does not acknowledge the existance of 'best jeans'. This is an oxymoron.

8. DA believes that any blog with the words "fountain", "Evil Eye" and "tequila" in it is on to a good thing.

9. DA considers footnotes to be massively underrated.

10. DA tries to make sense but recognises that this isn't always possible.

"Four years, fifteen thousand pounds and an Oxford degree. To operate a photocopier. Classic".

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